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Anxious... |
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I am feeling anxious this month, and I think I know the reasons why. High on the list is that my wife and I are about to drive our first-born child all the way across the country to college. Not only is he is our first child, a boy, but he has a disability. Even though he's fully capable of taking care of himself, and this is definitely an exciting milestone, I will naturally still worry about him. And let me tell you, paying for college is something I will never get used to!
Another worry on my mind concerns one of my mentors Joni Erikson-Tada. Joni, who has done more for the physically disabled community than anyone else I can think of, is battling breast cancer. If you aren't aware who Joni is, she has an eternally optimistic spirit, even though she's been in a wheelchair with quadriplegia since a diving accident that occurred when she was 17. (You can peruse Joni's blog at http://www.joniandfriends.org/jonis-corner/
Part of my anxiety also stems from seeing some of my friends, with whom I worked side-by-side at a previous ministry, let go due to a lack of funds. Dozens of ministries, many of them doing incredibly important things for disadvantaged people, are struggling financially. It's difficult watching them being forced to scale back. Fortunately for us at Need Project, we have never had enough funds to be anything but scaled back, so we don’t really have to worry about a down economy.
Speaking of which, some of my apprehension might be because of the economy. It can be frustrating to watch governments on the local, state, and federal levels struggle with a perceived lack of funds; the first programs they cut are the very services needed by individuals and families with disabilities. Do you think government officials would take a cut in pay to help a family in need? Call me cynical, but I doubt it.
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No Pain No Gain? |
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When I was young my Mom, grandmother, older brother, and sister drove our station wagon from southern California to Guatemala. Yes, the country of Guatemala, the one below Mexico. Every time I tell people we did that, they look at me as if my family was crazy. Over thirty years ago we left Dad at home and took off to the country of my Mom and Grandmother’s origin. My mother and brother alternated driving. I was in the far back on my knees so I could face forward on the backward facing back seat. Along the way, we stayed with relatives I never knew I had, or at hotels. I have no idea what my parents were thinking as they talked about this trip. Did they think this was perfectly safe? Did my dad worry about us, driving all that distance with no man older than a teenager? If I were to consider driving to Guatemala, the first thing I would think of would be getting killed somewhere along the way. Maybe my Dad was trying to get rid of us? I can think of all kinds of things my siblings and I did as kids, like riding our bicycles off the roof into the pool, that really were not safe and probably weren’t smart, but we did them. Guess what happened to us when we did these “not very wise” things? Some of us got hurt! My friend Jimmy lost a piece of his chin in an errant bicycle jumping accident; I broke my hand once or twice; my buddy Charlie broke his leg. And when I tell my children these stories, they look at me as if I’m crazy! What would possess us to do all these crazy things?
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Summer Vacation |
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When I was a boy, the last day of school was by far the best day of the year. Teachers couldn’t give you any more homework for three months! And you didn't have to hand anything in that was past due. It was too late. Your fate was set, whether good or bad. But the best thing about the last day of school was knowing that when you woke up the next morning, it would be summer vacation! I would always try to sleep until noon every day that first week of summer, but it usually didn't happen because my dad would have projects lined up for us to work on. Still, my friends and I would ride our mini-bikes all over the neighborhood. When we were younger it was our bikes, and when we were even smaller, Big Wheels (does anybody remember those?) We got soaked running and playing in the sprinklers and of course freaked out when we heard the ice cream man. We'd run into the house to beg money from Mom. We crammed so much activity into each day that the three months of summertime seemed to last forever – or at least like a whole year went by before school started again. At some point during summer, we'd go on The Trip. You know what I'm talking about. Dad would take a week off from work so the whole family could go camping or visit relatives. If we went camping, we had a list of all the necessary supplies and checked them off one by one. Can opener, check! Coffee, matches, band-aids; check, check, check! All the essential items were packed into our homemade recreational vehicle, which was an old potato chip delivery truck my dad transformed into an RV. We called it the "Big-O" because it was orange. And then off we'd go on an adventure!
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Don’t Do Us Any More Favors |
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I’ve been struggling to keep my cool while composing this month’s column. You’ll soon understand why. By now you’ve likely heard or read the story of the 7-year-old Russian boy whose American adoptive mother packed him on a plane and sent him on his way (alone) with a note tucked into his pocket that read in part: After giving my best to this child, I am sorry to say that for the safety of my family, friends and myself, I no longer wish to parent this child. As he is a Russian national, I am returning him to your guardianship and would like the adoption disannulled. See story: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,590863,00.html Now, there are always two sides to every story. The woman in question, Torry Hansen, suggests she was never informed of the boy’s mental instability. Still, one has to wonder why she decided to abandon the boy when she just as easily could have pursued numerous other legal options, all of which would have given her the relief she so desperately sought. Yet, the thing that angers me the most is the damage this incident has done to the families who are working through similar issues with both adopted and natural born children.
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Changes |
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Everybody remembers their first real job.
As for me, I landed mine fresh out of high school. It was a big deal. Real work and real money, a fair and livable wage for a fair day’s worth of work. I loved it! The company was family owned and all in all, it was a delightful place to set down roots and find my way. We all got along and everybody did well. But after ten years, circumstances changed and I felt lead to move on.
I recall the transition period from one career to another as being a bit tough. I bounced around from one job to another until settling down again with a great organization. Eleven years passed quickly and when circumstances changed again, another opportunity surfaced and we were again on the move.
Does this pattern sound familiar?
I’m a fairly spontaneous person and never planned at staying at any particular job for a very long period of time. But life gets busy and routines grow familiar and comfortable. There have been times when the thought of enduring the inconvenience of a change stopped me from tackling a new challenge.
In essence, I wasn’t willing to trade short-term pain for likely long-term gain.
My approach to work reminds me of an old sign spotted along an unpaved country road.
“Choose Your Rut Carefully,” it read, “You’ll be in it for the next ten miles.”
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